Guess I'll Always Care...

well this is it ....

in 12 hours me and the other birdies will be going to sweet apple one last time ....

i seriously have been pretending that this day didn't exist ....but theres nothing i can do ... i just gotta face it ... and try to enjoy it ... but its extremely hard ....... i had no idea how hard it would be.... but then again i am losing my family .....

these next couple of weeks will be mind numbingly hard to face ... i have never been in a situation were i spend every night and day for half a year with the same group of loving and caring people ... but then just have it all come to a screeching halt.... i just cant believe it ..... all week long i have been tossing and turning during the night just thinking about next week and my future ........

this journey has been the best 6 months of my entire life ...

and cant express how grateful, honored, and humbled i am to have met these incredible people...

and to have lived mine and soo many other peoples dreams at the age of 18.........

like i said almost 9 months ago.... "this is living proof that dreams can come true" .....

Bye Bye Birdie

I'm gonna miss you so;

Bye Bye Birdie,

Why'd you have to go?

No more sunshine,

It's followed you away;

I'll cry Birdie,

Till you're home to stay.

I'll miss the way you smile,

As tho' it's just for me;

And each and ev'ry night,

I'll write you faithfully!

Ooo Ooo Ooo Aah Oo Oo

Bye Bye Birdie,

It's awful hard to bear;

Bye Bye Birdie

Guess I'll always care,

Guess I'll always care,

Guess I'll always care!

its been awhile

Well i havent written a blog in awhile so i guess i will just try to fill you guys in ... so yea my last post was in celebration of opening .. but now ( 4 months later) were getting ready to close the show on sunday ( the 24th) .... i think i have finally come to terms with the idea of not seeing these incredible people every day ..... although it will be extremely hard to close the show .. it will be nothing compared to moving back home..... its like going to college for half a year and then being told ... "o jk you have to go back home and do High School again" ... it just really sucks ..... i love my fam and all ..... but im just going to miss the freedom and independence i have right now.... but i do understand that i still have to graduate HS and i have alot of work to do but idk .. it just sucks....

besides closing and all ive been running around like crazy, trying to get all my college stuff done ... i already had my first college audition this past week at Marymount ... me Danny and Catherine got to audition together .. so that made it easier.... but next is nyu and then a few more after that ...... also i have been auditioning for everything i possible can ... and i have been searching like a mad man for an agent ..... I have soooo much to do before i go back home on the 15th ...

Changing the topic alittle bit ..... my holidays were great... i got to spend it with both my family's ..... (the real one and the birdie one :) ) ...... The cast had a nice Xmas party and we did the whole secret santa thing and i was johns......

he really enjoyed his snuggie lol!!!

i also spent 11 hours in times square to watch the ball drop ....... and all we got was a balloon, chapstick, and a hat lol... o and we met these really kool people from Massachusetts..

But Yea .. this whole experience has been incredible and i wouldnt change it for anything...

Im just sad it has to come to an end .... 7 left ....